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Yet another time traveling clam


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I am sorry your species does not have eyes.


some of ours do!




"Clams have a row of eyes around their shells.


When we think of eyes and vision, clams are probably one of the last creatures that come to mind. But for some types of clams that live on the surface of the ocean floor, rather than buried beneath it, eyes can have a vital function for protecting against predators. In these animals, eyes have evolved that are effective motion detectors, and since the bivalve is a flattened circular creature, it is beneficial to have eyes all around the margin in order to see problems coming in from any direction."





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"Good thing I don't have eyes, huh? "


But if you don't have eyes... how can you read what I write? :)


with his E.C.P. (extra clammy perception)

How amazingly intuitive! Yes, there is a kind of Clam-Vision that all we clams will have in the future!


But I'm also using a Braille version of the the Internet, which helps clams immensely. That's right: The Internet will be in Braille! Invest in it!


Although in his title he is suggesting he is not the first clam to time travel.


I must have missed the first one. hehe :)

Actually there have been many other clam Time Travelers throughout history. Here's just one of the more important one's:




His name is Sir Salt E. Mcloughlin. He invented one of the first time machines in history, which he essentially did to win a bet. Y'see he was at a party with some of the most up-standing clams in all the shire.


When he suggested that, if possible, he would adopt a chrono-nomadic lifestyle traveling though time his friend challenged him to invent a time machine. Well ol' Salt E. had been drinking so much Lunar Juice he accepted the challenge and went on to make said time machine ... whilst still inebriated! There was clam with talent! That was back in 2016/2015. It was only in the swinging 2060's that Time Travel invention REALLY took off.


I am sorry your species does not have eyes.


some of ours do!

Oh, that's quite perverse!



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Mind you, this is just a guess... but if someone pinned me down I would have to suggest that our newfound clam friend is possibly a "reincarnation" of "Dave_Kinky". Both of them seem to share the same ribald (and quite welcome) sense of humor.


And for the record: I, for one, am not discriminatory about who goes about time traveling. I would never deprive a clam of such an activity simply because he (she?) is a clam. So rest easy Clamorian. And don't forget my point about clam chowder! ;)





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professional model making service, Fantasy Model Time Machine.



My goodness! They actually made a replica of Salt E.'s first Time Machine! It looks incredibly realistic!


Thank you for letting me know!


Also, Rain Man Time, your talk of clam chowder is quite ominous ...


And for the record most clams like to be known as "itshe". It covers all ground as far as describing a clam goes, without dehumanising itshe.



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  • 2 months later...

What a clamity it would be if another time travel Clam went down before its time. I really want to know how the oysters went extinct. This is no tyme to put the clamp down on your predictions! Come clean with the clamtashtrophy so that we may save your shellfish cousins while thier is still hope in the sea. I for one wish to always hear the clamor of clacking muscles. Alright I gotta stop typing now my fingers are starting to get a little clammy .



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  • 2 weeks later...

yeah ok so you have "eyes" shuuuuuuuure ok i know clams don't have fingers so how can you type you phoney? and if your really from the future anwser these questions with proof and reference and i'll take back what i said eariler ok?


1)junior senior's next hit song after move your feet


2)hit movies for 2008 with the script/screenplay and soundtrack


3) lottery numbers for lottto 64/9 alberta,calgary for friday august 24 2007 and the lottery numbers for next week


4)howa bout the schematics for your "time machine"


5)does world war 3 recreate the halocuast?


6) do zombies roam the earth if so when?


7)who shot martin luther king so i can kill the bastard


8)after the nintendo wii what major advancements does nintendo take?


9)do u have a genie in a bottle and if u do can i have it? cuase i have the perfect loophole system so i can get unlimeted wishes.


10)do u have a wormhole machine or portal to differnt/parralel/alrternite


universe like say to the naruto world? and if so can i have it?


11)how can clams talk,type,AND see? did yall like get evaloutinazed? and what about the birds and dogs and stuff can they talk and type?


12)when does global warming hit canada cuase i gotta know


13)that's all my questions dude and if you anwser them all with acutal beliveAbal answers instead of something stupid like "junior senior didnt have another hit song my pet dog and cat started a singing band isn't that great? ciiiiaooo forrr now!" cuase that's just retarded dude



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Remember the clam! I miss the clam! Bring back the clam!


Clammeo, Clammeo, wherefor art thou Clammeo?


Please come and save us from HDRKID!


I am sure you could teach Einstein the math he so desperately needs to fulfil his Rennaisance Man dreams!


I have heard rumors that Chronohistorian has finally completed his latest mission blasting the evil muscle trees into oblivion on Lunarium, and that he might be stopping by here again to entertain us all.... BUT DAMMIT I WANT MORE CLAM!!!







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